NATIVE AMERICAN RIGHTS GROUPS GO ON WAR PATH... FORCE VETO TO RETRACT ENTIRE POST

In response to a flurry of complaints from Native American rights organizations - here in the Northwest and elsewhere throughout the country - Veto has decided to remove his most recent post.

"We do not deny that Mr. Veto hustled one of our elders out of $5 at The Bitter End Pub," said Chief Mocking Bird of the Umatilla tribe. "We are used to such con jobs from the white man. But to ridicule our heritage, to speak in such ignorant stereotypes, to disrespect our women and children as he has... this Veto must pay."

Answering questions at a tense press conference that followed, Veto attempted to clarify his position: "Truth is, I didn't even know she was Native American at first. If I had to guess I probably would have gone with Mexican, maybe even Chilean or one of those other countries down in South America. I didn't find out about her heritage until afterwards, over a cigarette, as she wailed out stories about life on the reservation. But it didn't really matter to me anyway. All I knew was this woman challenged me to a game of pool for $5. She could have been from the shanty towns of Jamaica or the slums of Guatemala for all I cared. I was playing for pride. Come on people, everyone knows I still have nightmares about Margaret from the Mouse Trap. Gives me the chills just thinking about her face. Imagine losing to another old gray hair - and this time for money. It was too terrible to even think about. Her blood lines were the least of my concerns."

But the crimes of generations past still blow strong in the wind, and the Umatillans are proud Indian warriors. Veto had slipped at the tongue, and offered up red meat. Like it or not he was in their cross hairs now - the cross hairs of vengeance - and they refused to let him out of their sights. "We will skin him like a buffalo and carve tee-pees from his hide!" cried Chief Mocking Bird outside the conference hall. The swarming crowd of injuns exploded in agreement. They roared and danced and chanted, and pierced many ears with their war cries.

"Look Chief," Veto replied - he was hidden behind a wall of police escorts, being pushing towards an unmarked van - "I meant no disrespect to your people. And I took down the post. Now please, tone down the menacing threats."

"Hmm-mmm," sighed one Furious George fan, shaking his head in disbelief. He stood across the street, witnessing this modern day witch hunt unfold. It was a scene made for the CNN news ticker: mob of angry Indians finally get their day, shake down white man in broad daylight for whole town to see... "

"Poor Veto," he muttered to himself, "it ain't easy being a hustler."